


You Can't Catch Me, Gay Thoughts

by otaku_trash



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, Humor, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Multi, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-09 02:30:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7783303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/otaku_trash/pseuds/otaku_trash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They do, though. Not only do the gay thoughts catch him, but they tackle him and plague his mind.</p>
<p>or</p>
<p>Ennoshita's daily routine is very gay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Can't Catch Me, Gay Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> hey hi i didn't think i would be writing again so quickly but i told someone that i would write an ennotana centric fic to make up for the pathetically small cameo in my asanoya fic
> 
> enjoy!!!! if u dont who cares 
> 
> hahaha just read it
> 
> ps get used to seeing my user as pastelvolleyballs bc thats my tumblr and instagram (that flawless self promotion tho)
> 
> ^^ah shit never mind its too long a process haha kms

It's just a typical day for Ennoshita.

It's another point scored for their team. Tanaka is cheering obnoxiously loud. Why is he like this? It's a practice match. It's just a practice match. Tanaka and Noya still choose to whoop and scream. 

"Chikara, did you see that? Wasn't I so cool? Hm?" Ennoshita doesn't know what to say. He did see that, of course. They're on the same team. He tries to focus on answering, but it's hard to when Tanaka is leaning in close to whisper in his ear. His breath is warm, and it makes Ennoshita want to shiver. He doesn't though, because it's hard enough to ignore the piercing gazes and slight snickers from Kinoshita and Narita.  _Fuck you guys_ , he thinks. 

They're back to playing in an instant, and Ennoshita doesn't have any more time for these gay thoughts. He focuses on those nice receives, because he must take place of the receive master also known as Thigh-chi. Ennoshita is glad he doesn't have to hold the title of being the team dad, just the future captain. He thinks it's a little easier to be the mom. 

Back to those gay thoughts. Even as the ball lands smack against Ennoshita's arms, even as the clean receive sends the ball flying into the air, even as the ball is smashed down onto the other side of the court, Ennoshita is still overpowered by the gay. He imagines Tanaka as the team dad. 

"Nice one, Chikara!" He's suddenly being pulled off the ground by the waist. His face is a little warm. Ennoshita tries not to think about the fact that he's being held and carried around by Tanaka. 

They're at match point, now. Ennoshita braces himself for the harsh impact of the ball. He's concentrated. The receive is just as flawless as the rest. Tanaka brings his hand down, and hits the ball spot on. They score once again.

Ennoshita grins as he appreciates the stinging sensation that remains on his arms. They've won, now. Noya is rolling around and doing flips. Ennoshita watches from the side as Asahi manages to calm his boyfriend down. And Tanaka-

Wait... 

Something clicked in Ennoshita's brain and that last percent of sanity has gone. The gay thoughts are now parading around his head. Tanaka has pulled his shirt off. Sweat glistens off of his muscles. He's grinning like a madman.

Not again.

Ennoshita shouldn't have such a drastic reaction. He's seen Tanaka half-naked plenty of times. Yet, during this moment, everything is completely different. Tanaka's eyes are shining with pride and excitement. He's smiling genuinely, it's not that creepy fake smile he does sometimes. His shirt is being waved around like a flag as he parades around the gym. 

There's no way he can handle this. Instead of trying to turn down the maximum gay, he decides to do something more effective. 

"Tanaka, put your damn shirt back on!" Daichi looks relieved. Ennoshita has helped more people than himself. Daichi looks less stressed now that he's gotten one thing solved, and Ennoshita uses that excuse to justify why he stopped the celebration.

"You like it when my shirt's not on, Chikara!" Ennoshita flashes Tanaka a death glare and Tanaka puts his shirt back on without any other comments.

People begin to leave for the clubroom now that the match is over. Ennoshita volunteers to help clean up so he can keep his mind off of anything related to Tanaka.  _You can't catch me, gay thoughts_ , Ennoshita thinks as he races towards the storage room.

They do, though. Not only do the gay thoughts catch him, but they tackle him and plague his mind. Tanaka volunteers to help Ennoshita and walks to the storage room. The two of them are alone together, and Ennoshita wants to jump out a window.

 "Hey, Chikara, there's a test coming up, ya know? When can we meet up? I need help." Ennoshita wonders when Tanaka started calling him by his first name. 

"I'm free this whole week but you should probably ask the others about their schedules." 

They finish putting away the last of the equipment and lock up. 

Ennoshita thinks about his daily routine. The only thing Ennoshita really does is try to manage his gayness. He also thinks about how domestic he and Tanaka are sometimes.

"Chikara, let's go! I'll buy you meat buns." Ennoshita allows Tanaka to buy him some meat buns. They part ways and Ennoshita walks home, ending his typical day.

* * *

 The next day is relatively normal. He writes a slightly excessive amount of notes, knowing that he'll have to help Tanaka and Noya with every little thing. He eats lunch with Kinoshita and Narita, trying to tune out their lovey dovey couple-ness and the offhand comments about Ennoshita's big, gay crush on Tanaka. After school ends, he goes to the clubroom and gets ready to practice. during practice, they play a practice match, and Ennoshita ends up on the same team as two very enthusiastic second-years.

What's not part of his routine is when they score a point, and he's dragged into the celebration- again. Tanaka is twirling him around again, and Ennoshita doesn't know if he's more frustrated or embarrassed. 

"Come on, Chikara, be more enthusiastic!" Tanaka and Noya are being as annoying as ever and Ennoshita finally decides to do something about it. 

"I can be enthusiastic,  _Ryuu_ , but I doubt you'll ever see that side of me." He purrs out Tanaka's given name in a sickly sweet voice. It's only after he says the sentence when he realizes how suggestive it was. 

It's completely silent. Everyone stares at Ennoshita. 

"OHHHHHHH, HE WENT THERE!!!!" Noya is jumping up and down and shouting weird memes at Tanaka, who is frozen stiff. 

Tanaka suddenly lets go of Ennoshita. His face is bright red, and his eyes are blown wide. "I... what?... Did I get roasted...? Or..." Tanaka continues to mumble to himself. 

Ennoshita decides to give them what they want. His face stretches into a ridiculous grin, and he laughs loudly. Tanaka's face turns even more red, if that's possible.

Noya's eyes flash with excitement. "Wow, Ennoshita, you  _can_ be enthusiastic! I'm sure I'll never see you at your best, but this is something that will never be forgotten!" The way he says it is about as suggestive as how Ennoshita says it. He rolls his eyes. 

"Sorry, Noya, but you're not my type. I'm more for bigger, more muscular guys." Ennoshita winks. Noya is laughing even harder than before. Tanaka could probably cook an egg on his flushed red skin. 

Today is not as normal as usual, but it's still nice.

* * *

 It's Saturday now. All the second-years are gathered at Tanaka's house. Saeko-san makes jabs at her little brother and teases him as much as possible. Ennoshita isn't sure why Tanaka- well Ryuu, he supposes, as both Tanakas are in the house- is so flustered. They've all seen this before.

As usual, Noya pouts and struggles to study. He finishes as soon as possible and starts texting his boyfriend. Kinoshita and Narita don't need much help, so they just talk to each other. Tanaka knows how to study, but is too lazy to. Ennoshita keeps a close eye on him.

At some point in time, Saeko comes in with snacks that everyone reaches for. She teases her brother again, talking about how he's giving his poor boyfriend such a hard time. 

"If he does something bad, just tell me, Ennoshita! I'll beat him up for you! A pretty boy like you shouldn't have stress lines at such a young age."

Tanaka is extremely flustered. Ennoshita laughs. Noya comments on how he's genuinely laughing again, and how rare the occasion is. Ennoshita decides to try to laugh more, because he likes the way Tanaka reacts when he does.

Kinoshita and Narita leave first. They make up some lame excuse so they can go off and be a lovey dovey couple again. Noya stays because he and Tanaka are best friends, but he leaves soon after to visit his boyfriend, Asahi. Ennoshita doesn't really have an excuse to stay, but he doesn't have one to leave, either. He chats with Tanaka for a while. Saeko occasionally drops by to tease her brother. Ennoshita leaves around dinner time, not wanting to intrude and not wanting to be yelled at by his mother. He eats dinner and retreats to his room, where he messes around until he's tired. He rolls onto his side and falls asleep.

Saturday is as normal as ever.

* * *

 On Sunday, Ennoshita tries to get some sleep.

His attempts are short-lived as all his friends spam his phone with texts that insist he hangs out with them. He sighs and crawls out of bed.  _What have I ever done to deserve this?_ he wonders while pulling on some pants. Ennoshita flails around in the bathroom before leaving the house. The other second-years are waiting for him at the park. 

Kinoshita and Narita are being as affectionate as ever. Ennoshita tries not to throw his phone at their heads.

Noya and Tanaka are being buds as usual. Ennoshita wonders if he should third wheel the couple or the best friends. 

He ends up texting his friend Akaashi instead.

**Ennoshit** : help what's worse to third wheel

**Ennoshit** :  _image._ _jpeg_

**AkASSi** : um they're both bad

**AkASSi** : rip

**Ennoshit** : are u kidding me

**AkASSi** : idk what to tell u

**Ennoshit** : they forced me to hang out with them but im a fifth wheel

**AkASSi** : i still dk what to tell u

**Ennoshit** : omg Akassi u ass

**AkASSi** : at least spell my name right before u make puns u weeb

**Ennoshit** : doesnt pain-in-the-ass kuroo-san call that russian kid leg

**AkASSi** : yeah tbh idk if its ironically or unironically

**Ennoshit** : rip

**AkASSi** : dshujrghfuni

**AkASSi** : HEY HEY HEY WHOS STEALING MY BOYFRIJDJD AWYY FROME EME

**Ennoshit** : heyy im the fifth wheel here so im stealing ur bfs attention to look less awkward

**AkASSi** : oh shit rip

**Ennoshit** : ikr

**AkASSi** : wel at lesert foithughfhudh

**AkASSi** : god fucking dammit bokuto-san is an ass sometimes

**Ennoshit** : lmao 

Ennoshita doesn't notice that his friends are all staring at him. He most look kind of suspicious. There's a weird grin on his face and he's been laughing loudly here and there for the past ten minutes while staring at his phone. 

**AkASSi** : shit i almost ran into a lamppost can i call u instead

**Ennoshit** : sure

Ennoshita picked up the phone and heard Akaashi's rich voice on the other end of the line. 

"Hey, Ennoshit."

"Hey, Akassi." Ennoshita can practically hear Akaashi grinning. His own face hurts from smiling so much. 

"So. Fifth wheeling?"

"Yep. By the way, what's going on over there?"

"Ah."

Ennoshita laughs again. His friends observe him from afar. He's sitting on a bench, alone.

"Bokuto-san and Kuroo-san are being idiots. Kenma-san was too lazy to go outside but he kicked Kuroo-san out of the house. He's whining about his boyfriend now."

Ennoshita could vaguely hear Kuroo and Bokuto yelling stuff in the background.

"So you're third wheeling right now?"

"Basically."

Ennoshita laughs again. He doesn't think he's laughed this much with anyone except Akaashi. It's no wonder why they're best friends.

Akaashi huffs a sigh on the other end. "I know Bokuto-san loves me, but it's hard not to be jealous when he's always with Kuroo-san."

"If it makes you feel better, Kuroo-san is so in love with Kenma-san that it's not even funny."

"That's true."

Ennoshita smiled. "And anyway, if all else fails, at least you're not a single loser like me."

"Whatever, Ennoshit. If you stopped pining, you wouldn't be such a single loser."

"Says you."

"Shut up. We're together now, aren't we?"

"But that's because he confessed first."

"MInor details."

Ennoshita laughs for what might be the hundredth time.

"Oh god, I've lost them. Call you back later?"

"Of course. Bye, Keiji."

"Bye, Chikara. Good luck on your love life."

"Shut up." They both laugh a bit before Akaashi hangs up.

Ennoshita finally remembers that he was here at the park for a reason. He whips his head up and sees four people staring at him.

Kinoshita and Narita already know it was Akaashi, and don't ask for further explanation. Ennoshita is glad they are also his good friends.  _Maybe they would be his best friends if they weren't so affectionate all the time. They could really do less with the cute couple act._

Noya is grinning maliciously. He kind of reminds Ennoshita of Suga-san.

"Ooooooh, Chikara, do you have a boyfriend?"

Chikara scoffs. He can't imagine dating his best friend.

"No way."

"Who was that, then?"

"It was Akaashi, from Fukurodani. He's my best friend. I don't think I would ever date him."

"Oh really? You were laughing and smiling so much I thought your mouth was going to fall off."

Ennoshita is dead inside. Just because he's comfortable with someone who is a more lowkey meme than them, doesn't mean that they're dating.

"He has a boyfriend that he is very much in love with, and I 100% support them. Anyway, I already told you what my type is, and it's not pretty boys like my dear Keiji."

"You're on a first name basis with him?"

"Fuck off, Noya." 

Noya's howling with laughter. Narita and Kinoshita are snickering a little. Tanaka looks kind of uncomfortable. Ennoshita wonders why.

Ennoshita feels his phone buzz again and looks down to see that Akaashi is calling again. He picks up almost immediately. 

"Hey, Akassi. Did you find them yet?" Ennoshita ignores the disbelief on Noya's face. It definitely screams,  _how are you so rude to such an intimidating guy?????_

"Hey, Ennoshit. I found them. Do you think I can get away with killing them?" Noya''s face is even more disbelieving than before, because  _did the intimidating guy actually return that????_

"Of course. I'll help you hide the bodies."

"Bless."

"Do they have any last words?"

Akaashi gives the phone to Bokuto. "I just want to say, thank you, not only to God, but to Jesus."

"For what, though?"

"I've never seen Akaashi smile so much!! He looks really pretty right now!!!" Akaashi sputters in the background. Ennoshita snickers.

"I don't doubt it. What about the cat guy?"

There's some noise, and then Kuroo is talking. "Hey, are you stealing my man's man? Because that's not cool."

Ennoshita rolls his eyes. "I've been pining over the same guy for two years, and he definitely is not Akaashi. Don't you think he would have noticed, if I did like him?" Noya's eyes are literally the size of the moon right now, and it's definitely not nine in the afternoon.

"Damn, you're right. Good luck with your muscle man."

This time Ennoshita is the one to be sputtering. His face is turning red. Kinoshita and Narita are grinning evilly at him.

"H-how- what-"

"It's pretty damn obvious, my friend. Go get that ass."

"Stop staring at his ass and go stare at your boyfriend's ass."

"Gladly."

"Gross."

There's some laughter, and then the phone is back to Akaashi.

"I'll call you back when I've finished killing them. Maybe Kenma-san will help. Bye, Chikaraaaaaa."

"Byeeeeee, Keiji."

The phone clicks. Ennoshita turns off his phone.

Noya is looks really confused. Akaashi is not really cold. He's just quiet. He's probably intimidating because of his resting bitch face. Unfortunately, not everyone knows that. Noya has just experienced the childish and less composed meme also known as Akaashi.

Kinoshita and Narita (constantly referred to as a couple because they are one) don't question it at all.

Tanaka also looks confused. There's a little bit of something else that Ennoshita can't recognize. He ignores it.

Noya is the first to speak (again).

"So..."

"He's just my friend. Did you just hear him? Ridiculous. How can you be _that_ in love with someone?"

Ennoshita means it rhetorically but three people answer him all at the same time. Tanaka looks uncomfortable (again).

"Whatever! The point is, no, I don't have a boyfriend. If I did, it wouldn't be Keiji."

"So, if you're single, can I set you up with someone?"

"No way, Noya, unless you can find someone identical to the guy I'm pining after. You know. Muscles, taller than me, kind of loud. Akaashi and I have similar taste in men."

Everyone is surprised by what Ennoshita says, including himself.

Ennoshita realizes how ridiculously specific that is. It also sounds like an exact description of Tanaka.

_Oh shit, he totally knows._

But Tanaka didn't show any sort of realization. Ennoshita breathed a sigh of relief.

They go home soon after, because it's actually gotten kind of late. 

Today is not as normal as usual. Ennoshita hopes the awkwardness will die down tomorrow.

* * *

The awkwardness does die down, much to Ennoshita's relief.

If anything, Tanaka is even more energetic and affectionate than usual. He's been bugging Ennoshita all day. Ennoshita doesn't have the heart to push him away. Who would? Tanaka puts his head on Ennoshita's desk and whines, "Chikara..." in a grumbly voice. It's adorable, and Ennoshita tries not to scream.

Noya bugs him a lot today, too. He usually goes and bothers Asahi, but today he and Tanaka are following him around like lost puppies. Ennoshita wonders what would happen if he treated them like they were actually lost puppies.

He pets their heads affectionately and calls them by their first name. Noya seems content with the petting. Tanaka's mood improves significantly. Ennoshita makes a mental note to treat them like this more often.

After practice is over, Noya starts bugging him again.

"Hey, Chikara, so about that dating thing..."

"I already said no, didn't I? If you can find out who I like and force him to go on a date with me, I'll do it."

"I think I already know who it is, though." Ennoshita's head whips around at the speed of light. Noya makes sure Tanaka isn't paying attention before grinning and nodding in his direction. Ennoshita's face turns red. Noya winks and laughs.

"I can't believe this. Kill me now."

Tanaka has finally started paying attention. "What? Why?"

Noya is still laughing. Ennoshita glares at him before turning to Tanaka.

"Noya's being an ass."

"Okay, look here. Your crush is super obvious. On top of that, you haven't been very subtle with hints. The only person who doesn't know is the guy himself."

Tanaka is so confused. "Who? What? Who do you like? How is it obvious?" 

Noya is laughing even harder than before, because Tanaka just proved his point. Ennoshita starts laughing too. Tanaka really just wants to know what's going on. Ennoshita manages to escape the clutches of an insistent Tanaka and slips into his house.

Today is a pretty normal day.

* * *

 It's Tuesday. Noya keeps teasing Ennoshita. Ennoshita keeps blushing uncontrollably. Tanaka keeps getting confused. It's a never ending cycle.

Finally, Tanaka's innocent curiosity turns into genuine frustration and he demands to know what's going on. Noya high-tails out of there. _Goddamn it, Noya_ , Ennoshita thinks. He has to tell Tanaka himself. 

Technically, Ennoshita doesn't have to do anything. However, he's not a sadist, and doesn't enjoy watching Tanaka get frustrated and upset. He just wishes he could have avoided this for a longer amount of time.

"Um..."

Tanaka is waiting patiently. It's obvious that there's no getting out of this.

Ennoshita's nervousness turns into slight irritation.

"It's you. I like you. Isn't it obvious? Who could I possibly like that's muscular, loud, and taller than me? Do you know anyone like that besides yourself? And don't say Bokuto-san from Fukurodani, because we both know I would never do that. I've been dropping hints right in front of your face. Everyone knows except for yourself. Are you an idiot? I can't believe this."

Ennoshita huffs loudly. He finally realizes that he could possibly be rejected. _Oh shit._ Ennoshita tries to run away before he can get any answer.

"...oh."

Ennoshita looks up and sees that Tanaka is completely surprised about this. His face is spectacularly red and his eyes are wide. _He really is an idiot_ , Ennoshita thinks. 

"Um... I... Me too?"

Tanaka continuously stumbles over his words and Ennoshita tries not to laugh.

For some reason, Tanaka feels the need to elaborate, so he goes into detail about everything he likes about Ennoshita. Ennoshita stops him soon enough. His face is probably redder than a tomato.

They leave the club room together as an awkward mess. They're both blushing and mumbling things and occasionally their hands brush against each other.

Today is definitely not normal, but Ennoshita can get used to it. 

**Author's Note:**

> oh god akaashi and ennoshita being friends is like SOooOO good do u even know
> 
> so good
> 
> 10/10 would recommend
> 
> hahaha the ending was sudden and not gradual enough but i feel like realistically you're thrown into situations you're not prepared for so yeah good job ennoshit
> 
> too many horizontal lines but since when have i cared
> 
> hahahahahahaha did i give you enough day to day stuff or do you want more
> 
> too bad 
> 
> bye bye 
> 
> i think my next will be a kyouhaba is that ok with u
> 
> bye for real
> 
> EDIT: oh shit i forgot to say!!! i based some of this off of my own life (again) just the akaashi and ennoshita part because my best friend and i are kind of like that haha love you joy


End file.
